Saturday, March 29, 2008

Sister wife

My wife jokingly(I think) told me to find a sister wife while I'm in Utah. Thats what polygamist Mormon wives call each other. My wife and I watch "Big Love" on HBO and they make it look like having 3 or 4 wives would be kind of nice. Really my wife just wants someone to help her take care of the kids and house while I'm out on the road. I haven't found anyone yet. There's a few problems with my sister wife hunting. First of all we're not Mormon. That's probably important to a sister wife. We don't really have room either. She's have to sleep in our office. Actually only every other night, her and my 1st wife would have to switch off. The other problem is I'm not sure my current wife really wants me to make sweet love to another woman every other night. She's old fashioned, if anyone is going to turn down my sexual advances it should be her. Another problem is I can barely afford the 1 wife, 2 kids, 1 cat, and 2 Hermit crabs, I have now. What my family really needs is another breadwinner. I guess we need a brother husband more then a sister wife. And by brother husband I mean a black guy. I really don't want another fella making sweet love to my wife while I'm gone. Plus I don't want to sleep in the office when I get home. There might be a few advantages to the brother husband though. Especially if he could fix stuff. Plus I'd have someone to talk about guy stuff with. I can see us sitting over morning coffee wearing our monogrammed bathrobes. Mine with a big number 1 on the back, his with a number 2.
Me "So did you catch the Mariners game last night?
Him " No I was busy banging your wife."
Yeah ok, brother husband is out. Sister wife is back in. I have until Sunday.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

dude dont you think the irs would have noticed 52 dependents?